20th of July, 1969

The moon gets its light by reflecting rays from the sun. Without the sun the moon is nothing, just a dark entity in the giant vacuum we call space. You make me feel whole, with you i can be anything i want to be. I have confidence and i embrace life to the full. You make me someone. I am the moon and you are my sun.







Approx; 60.7 billion people, that we know of.

Pretty sick of just being one of an approximation..








From, Vik x

Taps at my window.

I just turned to look at him. There was something about the pale, dusky light pouring from the window that made his eyes sparkle with unspoken words. They looked hollow, in such a full way - as if he had so many things he wanted to say, but he knew it wasn't the right time. The stupidly ridiculous hat was perched on his head, causing the long buried memories of summer to come flooding back. They had been stored in a box at the back of my mind, just to stop them teasing me whilst the rain fell and the skies were grey. Him sat in that net backed hat threw me violently into my little gemmed orange dollies, sat on the park bench in the fading light of the summer days. Messing nervously with my hands in my lap, paying no attention to the large group of summer-drunk teens by my side, who knew their claim to the innocence of youth was dimming. Awkwardly focusing on the scuffs on my toes and the dirt on my heels, from yesterdays episode with the long grass and the murky ponds, my naive head was swimming with the expectations and the love for the ever fading holidays. Nobody needed to say a word, but we all knew it was the summer of our lives. The summer for firsts, lasts and in betweens. The summer of irreplaceable feelings of belonging and inclusion. Our daily rituals had become somewhat of a culture, causing the holidays to become useless in terms of a break from school and brighter in terms of it becoming our way of life. So sitting with tanned arms and grazed knees on that bench was no different from the routine of previous days. The feeling i felt for him then, complimented the grassy air and the cracked paving flags. It grew stronger, much like the bonds formed with the people who surrounded me. As summer filled our heads, romance filled our hearts. Some more than others.
By the end of the seemingly eternal vacation, hearts were broken and dignities fixed. As the school year started, the dreams and wishes ended of a summer that seemed to prove that anything was possible. Studies started, along with the winter winds and the forgotten chills of the all important rain storms. The desire for cheap alcohol turned into the need for hot chocolates and warm milk. We swapped our immodest skirts for umbrellas and our neck scarfs for woolen knits. As the fashion of the vibe changed, one thing didn't. Of all the comings and goings and the inconsistencies that summer held, one thing remained. It was him.
I knew by looking into his eyes, there and then in the pale dusky light pouring from the window, he knew it. He knew that the events and the drama of the months before and weeks after our well-spent summer holidays didn't matter. Regardless of it, there was one thing that we had spread further than any of the frisbees we threw in the sun or the races we ran on the grass. I knew what his eyes were saying. I hope he knew what mine were replying.
Darling, i love you as much in gloves and scarfs than i did in trucker hats and tank tops.

Very Pretty.

Hey thanks. Thanks for that summer.
Its cold where youre going, i hope that your hearts always warm.


Nights are very long. In the grand scheme of things, obviously. Because in comparison to the day, nights are generally shorter. Medically speaking, the average human being sleeps for at least a third of their life. One whole third. Unless you live with Darren Murphy, who snores. ALOT. So for two sixths of your lifetime, you are (in most cases..) horizontal, eyes shut, deep breathing, dreaming. That sure is one hell of a way to spend your time.
That means for the other two thirds you are awake. You are eyes open.
This scares me.
This thought makes me scared.
Why?
Because that isnt long enough.
Just two thirds doesnt seem like alot.
I want to see the world. I want to wake up on a beach and wonder how i got there. I want to set fire to a pan and burn part of my kitchen. I want to lose my house keys and be locked out until my mum comes down with a spare key. I want to miss my flight and be stuck in the airport on my own. I want to sit on top of a building in the sunshine eating icecream. I want to throw a snowball from the top of a hill and see how far i can get it. I want to forget where i parked my car and have to walk around for ages trying to locate where the flashing light is as i unlock it with the fob. I want to get on a train without knowing where its going. I want to paint my walls different colours that dont match. I want to snorkle on the Great Barrier Reef. I want to have breakfast in a HUGE bed in a very posh city central hotel in New York. I want to camp in spain. I want to be kissed on the very top of the Eiffel Tower. I want to take my mum to a spa for the weekend. I want to have my hair cut by Nikki Clarke. I want to learn how to make pancakes. I want to stay out all night and forget that i have school in the morning. I want to pay alot of money to go away for the week and never once leave my hotel room. I want to build a room that only i am alowed in. I want to swim in an ice cold river. I want to sleep on grass. I want to learn to play one song on the acoustic guitar. I want to design my own wedding dress. I want to cook Christmas dinner for everyone i know. I want to throw a party that will get my house trashed. I want to stand barefoot in Hyde Park and have a picnic there. I want to got o Blackpool for a week. I want to have twins. I want to write my own music. I want to jump off a roof. I want to sleep in my car. I want to see my book on the shelf in Waterstones. I want to visit a poppy field. I want to lie under my white covers all day. I want to spend the whole day in a library. I want to make my Grandma proud of me. I want to get kicked off public transport. I want to name a star. I want to sit up in bed and see the ocean.

Two thirds?
I guess i'd better get started.